you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
