Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
