someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize