it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
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