i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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