We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize