from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
