So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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