Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize