Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize