I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
