I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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