He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize