So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
