i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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