I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
