we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize