I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
