her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
