If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
