He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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