Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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