the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
