What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
We left an ass print on the piano.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
