she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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