I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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