What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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