Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
tell me about the eggs
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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