Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I think pants incapable of making pants work
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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