You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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