Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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