His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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