Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize