just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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