well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
