she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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