how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
