I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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