I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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