3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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