I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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