I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
