I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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