So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
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