i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
