I don't usually arrange sex via text message
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
