i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
