I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Bang-toberfest begins!!
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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