Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
