he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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