this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Randomize