dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Randomize
